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Imposter syndrome… it sounds like a medical diagnosis, doesn't it? This was a term I heard thrown around as an undergraduate student, but more so now that I'm a grad student. It's a term that originated in 1978 when two psychologists, Pauline R. Clance and Suzanne A. Imes, first identified the "imposter phenomenon" as an issue among high-achieving women who experienced a sense of "intellectual phoniness." It is a feeling that exhibits itself by challenging our competence. We experience imposter syndrome when we feel incapable of performing tasks in comparison to others around us, or when we lack confidence in our abilities.
This is a feeling I have always experienced to some extent, but it became more heightened a few months ago: a general feeling like I couldn't get anything done, yet I couldn't ask for help or vocalize my issues for fear that I would be considered unworthy of being in the job or degree program that I was in. Turns out I'm not alone: Becky Ponting, a psychologist at the U of A, says around 70 per cent of people experience imposter syndrome, and that it is even more common among grad students. I think imposter syndrome has become even more prominent during this COVID pandemic as we are more isolated from our peers and our support groups, and no one really knows how everyone else is doing or managing their hectic schedules.
Acknowledge your feelings
An important first step is to identify that you are dealing with imposter syndrome and be brave enough to have that important discussion with yourself. Sometimes thought patterns and feelings need to be said out loud or written down to be recognised, because you may not even realize what you're feeling is imposter syndrome.
For me, I realized imposter syndrome manifested in not wanting to publicise my professional achievements until a period of time had elapsed. For example, I did not update my LinkedIn profile for almost two months after gaining a new position and starting a new degree. I was afraid that I wasn't deserving of those achievements.
Have a conversation
Then, find trusted people to share those feelings with; this could help provide a sense of belonging and help you realise you are not alone in your feelings. It may help to connect with others who are in similar situations as you. Sometimes connecting with people in a similar role with a similar background and experience can help foster a sense of community and thus confidence in your abilities.
For me, this meant having discussions with others about what imposter syndrome meant to them. I heard responses such as "the fear of being found out like I'm a fraud or something" and "when you get promoted to a position that you may be well deserving of, but yet feel like you are not qualified for." It helped to have honest conversations with other graduate students who are experiencing the same feelings. The group meetings facilitated by my courses in Rehabilitation Science really helped me connect with other graduate students and provide a means of support to break down the workload and understand that I am not alone.
Ask for help
Reach out and ask for assistance if you feel overwhelmed in any sense. The workshops and resources offered by the Academic Success Center, Counselling & Clinical Services, and FGSR are good places for students to start.
Resist comparing yourself to others
Sometimes, taking a step away from keeping up with everyone else's achievements on social media may just be the best decision we can make for ourselves. Alex has some good advice for taking care of your mental health while using social media.
Write down your feelings and accomplishments
Write down your past achievements and the reasons why you are in certain roles! If you prefer, you could record yourself on a voice note and that way you have a record of your thought process and can review it if those feelings flare up again. There are unique qualities each of us brings to our academic roles, our leadership roles, and all opportunities we face. Human beings are a creature of habit, and reminding ourselves of the things we have achieved in the past will help motivate and encourage us to continue to strive for greatness. Listing past accomplishments will surely remind you of certain obstacles that you may have faced to achieve your goals, and that may be the necessary push to validate your current feelings and even give you ideas on how to face current predicaments.
What I've learned
Confronting imposter syndrome is an opportunity to develop a healthy mindset in dealing with the possibility of failure. For me, using these strategies and confronting imposter syndrome has meant asking questions in meetings, even when I might have felt scared or ashamed to speak up before. If you don't ask how will you learn, right? We are all here in university to learn.
Experiencing "imposter syndrome" may just be a momentary feeling and it is not an indication of our whole life. Although we may experience imposter syndrome, that does not mean we are imposters and undeserving of our accomplishments. For me, this meant learning to identify the triggers that led me down the imposter syndrome rabbit hole, as well as managing my expectations of myself and understanding that university is a learning experience and I am not expected to be an expert right away!
Coincidentally, as I was writing this article I got an email about the inaugural episode for FGSR's Grad School Confidential podcast titled "Who Am I to Talk About Imposter Syndrome?" and I would strongly recommend that ALL students check it out! These days I remind myself that nothing happens by chance and the fact that I am in my program is no mistake. Therefore all I can do is continue to strive to do my best and not allow my own thoughts to limit me and keep me from achieving my full potential. Remember, we are all here to get an education and become better informed. We do not know it all from the start, therefore we should offer ourselves grace and patience whenever we may feel out of our depth. It's all going to be okay!