Is my partying a problem?

Psychologist and guest author Becky Ponting explains how to decide whether a party lifestyle is helping or hindering you.

Becky Ponting - 20 January 2023

Student psychologist Becky Ponting answers a student's question about drinking and partying. Photo credit: Monica Di Loxley, Unsplash (2019)

Photo credit: Monica Di Loxley, Unsplash (2019)

Dear Maddi,

My family has told me that they think I drink and party too much, but I don’t see it as an issue. I’m living my best university life, and get-togethers with drinking and pot are a big part of it. How do I know if it’s a problem, and what am I supposed to do if it is?

Signed,

Curious

Dear Curious,

I’m glad you reached out, because I think a lot of students are in the same position, where partying seems like an inevitable part of the post-secondary experience. From faculty wine-and-cheese welcome events, to meeting new classmates at the pub for beers, it can feel like alcohol is everywhere on campus.

Movies often depict college life as one big keg party where binge-drinking and smoking pot are daily occurrences. However, media portrayals of campus life often differ from reality. Below are some facts to consider when evaluating your situation.

To begin with, partying may not be quite as common as it seems! Many university students go long periods of time without drinking, or don’t drink at all. According to the 2019 National College Health Assessment (a survey sent to University of Alberta students), students estimated that 95% of their peers consumed alcohol in the last 30 days, when in fact, only 63% of respondents had actually done so. That means out of the roughly 40,000 students who attend U of A, we could estimate that 14,800 people (about 37% of the student body) actually haven’t drank alcohol in the past month. When it comes to cannabis, the numbers are even more striking, with over 75% of students surveyed indicating that they have either never used cannabis, and/or had not used over the previous 30 days. I’m sharing this information as a reminder that despite the stereotypes, not all university students are spending their days getting drunk or high. Check out the University of Alberta Alcohol Through Your Lens Project for some campus specific insights. 

You shared that your family is concerned about your drinking and partying, but that you’re not worried. One thing to consider is whether you care and respect the people who are expressing concern about you? If so, you might want to think about what specific concerns they have. Do they disapprove of all substance use in general, or is it more particular to your situation? If you’re not sure, you might want to ask them what specifically has them worried. Missing academic deadlines, skipping classes, making less safe choices (such as getting significantly impaired with people you don’t know very well), driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol or drinking/using to the point of vomiting or blacking out can all be signs that your substance use has moved from casual to concerning. 

So what to do next? Sometimes it can be helpful to write down what you like about partying as well as the drawbacks. Many people enjoy how drinking and substances can bring about feelings of relaxation, social bonding and well-being. However, it’s also common to dislike aspects such as the cost, feeling down the next day, future health risks, or the distraction from their studies or longer term goals. These are just examples, but try reflecting on your own thoughts, while maintaining an open and curious mindset. What works for you about the status quo, and are there any parts you are finding concerning or less than enjoyable?

It is also worth considering the future risks associated with drinking and smoking pot. Did you know that alcohol is a known carcinogen, according to the International Agency for Research on Cancer. In other words, it has been proven to cause cancer in humans. Strong scientific consensus links liquor consumption to multiple types of cancer, including breast cancer, head and neck cancer, liver cancer and colorectal cancer. Alcohol is in the same grouping as tobacco, asbestos and arsenic: all are Group 1 carcinogens.

According to the Canadian Centre on Substance Use & Addiction, having three to six drinks a week increases your risk of developing some types of cancer, and more than seven drinks per week will also increase your risk of heart attack and stroke, with each additional drink per week increasing the danger to your health.

If you feel your alcohol or substance use is not causing problems, it makes sense you’re not motivated to make a change. In that case, my recommendation would be for you to stay mindful moving forward. Seeking out information or tracking your experiences with an open mind is a great start. So for example, if you notice a physical, emotional or social consequence of partying, pay attention and consider adding it to your mental list of downsides. On the other hand, you can also reflect on ways in which it continues to serve or help you. And don’t forget to track how much money it’s costing you, because it does tend to add up fast! 

Another option could be to try cutting back. For assistance, you could consult Knowing Your Limits With Alcohol assessment guide from the Canadian Centre on Substance Abuse & Addiction. The research-based guidelines explain that all levels of alcohol consumption are associated with some risk to your health, so drinking less is better for everyone. Even cutting down a little bit can be significantly beneficial, from saving you money, to having better physical health, less cancer risk, more energy, a better mood, a clearer head and better sleep. If you want to try limiting or cutting back, you could consider trying a few substance free days per week (e.g., stay sober every other day), or limiting yourself to no more than 3 to 6 standard drinks per week, which carries moderate risk of alcohol-related harms (compared to higher risk for those who consume more than 6 standard drinks per week on a regular basis).

Based on your letter, Curious, I realize you may not want to make any big changes to your partying at this point. However, there is always the option of giving yourself a trial period with no alcohol/drugs at all to see how you feel. Dry Feb is an online, third-party fundraiser that challenges people across Canada to go alcohol-free for the month of February while raising funds for life-saving cancer research. By participating in Dry Feb, you can help raise awareness about the link between cancer risk and alcohol, promote the idea that we can modify our alcohol consumption to reduce cancer risk, and raise funds to help individuals living with cancer today! 

Of course change doesn’t need to occur only during a particular month. You could give yourself a 30 day challenge any time to see how you feel without recreational drinking or drug use. Use the extra time each week for something healthy or fun, and consider using the money you save to celebrate without substances, such as treating yourself to a dessert night with friends, trying a new restaurant, grabbing a few specialty coffees with classmates, or buying yourself that new gadget you’ve been eyeing.

One final point…Don’t give up if you try to cut back from alcohol or substances and aren’t successful. There is lots of local professional treatment and self-help support available, including the AHS Provincial Addictions Hotline. Listed below are some resources you might consider accessing, if you feel you need help.

Curious, I’m really glad that you sent in your question, and I hope this article gives you a few new ideas to consider. Whether or not to party and how much is a very individual decision, and the choice will always be yours. I hope whatever you decide turns out to be the best choice for you, and that you stay safe and healthy.

Sincerely,

Becky 

Written by Becky Ponting, Guest Author for Dear Maddi and Registered Psychologist for Counselling and Clinical Services and edited by Suman Varghese Counselling and Clinical Services Satellite Psychologist for the Faculty of Arts and FGSR.

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